Sweet Prince's Heaven
That world, my world my heaven that place where all my dreams and desires come true, where I can experiment all those wonderful things I know. This is what god might have felt, the knowledge of a feeling is nothing if it can't be originally felt, being conscious about it is not enough. People may not understand what my heaven is.... and to explain it is hard to.
Millions of stories, all equally great, and the stories my soul mates will all create, all an incredible paradise... something never seen before. And then is me.... Xag, the cutest being ever made perfect as I can be... happy incredibly happy all the time, capable of feeling everything and be happy about it.... a kid, 10 - 15 years old, the kid destined to save the world he created with his friends and to other people.
God knows that thinking about this, makes me happy. Sometimes is too strong and gets me out of this world, is my fantastic and great craziness!!!! that one I love so much... my neurosis and my hysterical side.... my sarcastic comments, the beauty and good in the most horrible and sad experiences.... cuz all its perfect Ying and yang all combined in a perfect delicious way.... its like imagine the taste of the most incredible food ever, like discovering the philosophers stone, like being god!!!!!! And sure it feels great!!!!!!
In "The Client" movie there was this bit, I replayed over and over, a line spoken by the boy protagonist; it was something like:
- "I hate drunk people, they always say they are not drinking anymore, but they always do and come at night to beat you up, and you have to defend yourself with a bat for your life […] I told the judge all about the beatings and the humiliation and how has made us sleep outside"
And I think now, I wished I was that boy, don't know why tormentors and sad pasts attract me, I really wish my dad would have beat me up and I wished that real bullies tortured me at school. But no, my life has been so simple, so empty... this life was chosen for me to not have strong feelings for anything, it’s so gray, there are no sad things or happy things, just things, boring things. I guess this is why I dream so much about completely sad and completely joyful experiences, because I can't stand the world in gray as it is.
(12 days late)
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