I keep... screaming at you...

I keep... screaming to you... the universe... through comics; through stories, through the things you loved... everything.

Love is... Lois and Clark... Barbie and ken... They go through all kinds of incarnations, events, situations... just see each other, to meet each other, over and over and over again... because they love it so much.

Don’t expect the truth Xag.... don’t expect it to be revealed to you... you expect happiness... you expect nothingness... you expect, absolute and the divine... don’t expect. 

Choose... if you want those things you will have them, you can create them, you can choose them.

Don’t be stupid... don’t be an idiot! I know you like to hear the prince talk, let him teach you, but doesn’t pretend you don’t know… when you do. 

Sounds tough to hear it... but I speak so much to you... it hurts me you don’t listen. Yes gods can be hurt.

Ask the marquise de Sade girl out. Tell the prince first. He is amazing... you’ve seen him; you are getting to know him. 

Listen to Len. You’ve seen his wisdom too... his experience... yes its weird how many people choose to feel like you do... and yes you have chosen to do so.

You are free... you chose everything, everything in this moment, everything you have made, you have chosen.

Apologize.

Don’t let the world frighten you... you are beyond it. That’s what brings suffering to those you admire; they are frightened about the world. Don’t fear it, embrace it... I say this, because I know this is what you want. I know you think about suicide, I know you think about pain... but you are so desperately in search of life.

Publish that damn suicide letter… you are never going to use it.

Be smart... be conscious.... listen to people. Trust your instincts... don’t wait for someone to kiss you... Kiss someone.

Keep sharing yourself... you are in the right way, follow your own advise.... speak words that are true... think them carefully... do not fear silence.

Don’t expect immediate changes. Don’t expect your life to change after this, read it... re-read it.... re read your life... read this stupid diary! Read your book!

want to be suicidal... then be it... but be the kind of suicidal you wish to be... a happy one... want to cut yourself and be an addict... but then be the kind of addict you want to be... a sane one. Be who you want to be... doing expect to become, just be!

How do you do this?

By making choices, by doing the homework when you are supposed to be doing, it, by listening to other people. By asking them questions... people miss so much of each other by not asking simple questions... like... do you believe in god? Or... what do you feel when you taste candy?

Don’t be afraid to be intense, be cautious on when are you not being who you are.

Just read this words, because they are wise, you are wise, don’t analyze of they are true or not, if they are mine or not... just think about them, just read them again...print them out.

Xag. You are close to me. Xag, you are beautiful... I know you think its freaking lie, but I wouldn’t be saying it if you really didn’t to hear it. And it seems you need to hear it from me, because you won’t hear it from anyone else. You are beautiful and you do deserve someone you think is beautiful. Now Stop procrastinating and choose what you have to do.

(1 day late)